… you’re 3-year old’s Hanna Montana birthday party had a seating arrangement & place cards.
… you take notes while watching Bridezillas.
… it takes you 2 weeks and four vendors to plan dinner.
… you throw rice at graduations.
… you fight the urge to bustle every gown you see.
… you’ve memorized other peoples vows.
… you insist Thanksgiving begin with a rehearsal dinner.
… you can recite wedding stats by memory.
… when you go grocery shopping, you request an estimate.
… you know the floorplan of every venue within a 50 mile radius.
… your to-do-lists are in calligraphy.
… you’ve finalized vendors for your kid’s PTA school carnival.
… your brunches include a dessert bar.
… your last Easter dinner was more extravagant than most weddings.
… you can fix ANYTHING with two-way tape, bobby pins and lip gloss.
… you ask yourself “What Would Martha Do?”
… you have an emergency stack of linens in your trunk.
… during family vacations, you constantly “cue” your kids for pics.
… your day planner is a guestbook.
… you can tie a chair sash ribbon in 3 seconds, blindfolded.
… your work desk has a centerpiece.
… you’ve altered a dress with a toothpick and dental floss.
… you’ve paid a wedding DJ not to play the “Chicken Dance”
… every time you exit church, you imagine sparklers and balloon send-offs.
… you send your dentist a save-the-date to confirm your appointment.
… you’ve dressed your daughter as a flower girl, just for fun.
… you can no longer digest fondant icing.
… you always show up 2 hours early, just to make sure things are “set”
… you can spot a single missing sequin bead, from 20 yards away.
… you brag about your WeddingWire ratings.
… you’ve seen more women cry than The Bachelor.
… you’ve brainstormed & outlined the timing for your son’s slumber party.
… when in a pet store, you resist the urge to throw birdseed.
… you carry other peoples budget spreadsheets in your purse.
… you know during the bouquet throw is the best time to sneak a drink of wine
… you know the exact number of votives that can fit on a 72″ buffet table
… you’ve inhaled bubbles.